The Final Chapter, part 2

Last night, I continued to knock heads at Mafia with my "patternlessness." I won the first game as a final round villager, and in the last game as a mafioso, I very nearly wiped out the entire village, until at the last second, I was lynched. How perfect that would have been...


But this morning, my patternlessness totally broke. I lost it in the classroom. We all had to give a farewell speech at the end of our last crit, and I said all the good things that I wrote in my last post, more or less. Then, my face went to pieces. I had to keep looking down and bending toward my sneakers to wipe my eyes and nose, and doodling furiously in my notebook just to stop from crying even harder.

Fuck. I can't remember the last time I cried in public like that.

In that respect, though, I wasn't alone. We all supported each other, as I hope we continue to do over long distance.